Trust is one of the most important things in a relationship, and without it, the bond won’t last long. When partners have to constantly question their loved one’s motives or keep track of them, it shows that there are much deeper issues below the surface.
This is what a woman began to realize when her boyfriend kept finding ways to spend time with his ex. He didn’t like it when she questioned him about his behavior, so he tried to gaslight her into accepting his actions. She just couldn’t take it anymore.
More info: Reddit
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The poster mentioned that her boyfriend had been sick, and since he hadn’t changed his address, his insurance paperwork got sent to his ex’s house
The man’s ex offered to bring him his insurance card and take him to the hospital, but the poster felt uncomfortable with that and refused the help
Later on, the woman got to know that her boyfriend had gone to his ex’s house to use the bathroom and charge his phone, as he didn’t return her calls for hours
The poster shared screenshots of a text exchange where her boyfriend kept trying to convince her that she was blowing things out of proportion
The woman felt hurt by his actions and thought about breaking up since he had been back and forth between them for years
The poster shared that her boyfriend had been sick for a while and that his insurance paperwork had to be sent. Since he hadn’t changed his information from his ex’s house, all of it got sent to her. He didn’t seem to be bothered by the situation and was okay to have her also involved in the process.
Most people who stay in contact with their ex might do so because of unresolved feelings. Either they might still have lingering romantic thoughts about the person, or not know how to process what happened between them. These emotions can end up causing problems for them when they enter new relationships.
The poster could see that her boyfriend was too closely connected to his ex. The other woman offered to bring his insurance card and take him to the emergency room. The man didn’t stop his ex from connecting with him, and he also went out of his way to go to her house. His excuse was that he needed to charge his phone and use the bathroom.
It seems like the man didn’t want to give up his relationship with his previous girlfriend. He was still stringing her along and enjoying her company, even though it hurt his partner. According to research, it was observed that around 40% of people still keep in touch with their ex, and out of that, 13% talk to their ex several times a week, which means that it’s more common than one would expect.
The poster lamented that her boyfriend had been going back and forth between her and his past girlfriend for years. Despite having a kid with the OP, the man seemed to treat both of his relationships equally. He also kept half of his stuff at her house. It seems like the couple had broken up a few times over this issue, and had recently just gotten back together.
The woman confronted her partner over the issue, but he dismissed her concerns. He kept trying to normalize his behavior and how much time he was spending with his ex. This obviously made the poster feel annoyed and hurt. She didn’t know whether to break up with him or stick it out.
It’s clear that the man wasn’t admitting to his mistakes. Experts say that when a person gaslights their partner or gets defensive when their mistakes are brought up, it is often a glaring red flag. Couples who aren’t able to have honest conversations struggle with their bond and eventually might not be able to sustain their connection.
The woman just seemed to be a placeholder for her boyfriend. Based on what she shared about him, he kept flitting between her and his ex. He didn’t seem to value either of them enough to cut off ties, and so he played both of them like a fiddle. Hopefully, after reading the comments, the woman might end things with her toxic boyfriend and find someone who values her.
What advice would you give to this woman? Do share your honest thoughts in the comments below.
People confronted the woman on why she kept giving the man so many chances, and they also urged her to leave
